Breaking News:Monkey About Town Attacks Woman

[Wee67]

I realize this is a very serious story as the victim may die, but this is the one everybody will be talking about tomorrow. Our piece on the most immediate effects of the stimulus bill, the consumer story about how banks can dip into your checking account without your permission if you miss a mortgage payment... all will be lost in the haze of the chimp attacks story.

It happening now, so here are editor's notes-

THE CHIMP LIVED THERE IN A HOUSE AT 241 ROCK RIMMON ROAD FOR OVER 20 YEARS OLD...

IT GOT OUT OF A HOUSE....SEVERELY INJURED A FRIEND OF THE HOMEOWNER. IT WAS RUNNING AROUND THE YARD.

THIS IS A WELL KNOWN MONKEY AROUND TOWN. IN PARADES, OTHER TOWN EVENTS.

THE NAME OF THE CHIMP IS TRAVIS.

THE VICTIM , A WOMAN IS ...SEVERLY INJURED. (OFF RECORD...LIFE THREATENING)

MONKEY WAS SHOT BY P.O AND GOT INTO THE HOUSE AND DIED.

LARGE POLICE PRESENCE STILL AT THE SCENE

HAPPENED AT 3:44PM

POLICE ON THE SCENE BEFORE THEN

[Hector]

Chimp is an ape, not a monkey.

[Hector]

I feel sorry for the chimp.

[Mikey]

I thought keeping any kind of Monkey's or apes is illegal in the United States ?

[Wee67]

Chimp is an ape, not a monkey.

Yeah, i remember that from POTA. We did not air that mistake. Thanks, though.

I thought keeping any kind of Monkey's or apes is illegal in the United States ?

(((In CT, it was only recently made illegal))) A new law requires new owners of such animals to have permits, but does not apply retroactively, according to David Leff, deputy commissioner of the state Department of Environmental Protection.

[jessica]

Chimps are really very powerful and dangerous. They are ten times stronger than a human and can tear off your arm in the blink of an eye. I don't know if that man who was attacked last year ever survived. It was a very bad attack and he was placed in a medically-induced coma until they could stabilize him.

[Vortigern99]

An adult chimpanzee is indeed a huge and ferocious wild animal that should not be allowed to roam free, nor indeed kept as a "pet" by anyone.

Most people think of chimps as those cute little pink-faced sweeties we sometimes see in movies and TV shows, little realizing that those are young chimps who have not reached sexual maturity and so are passive and easily controlled. Adult chimps can grow over five feet in height, are quite aggressive, and as our local POTA expert has noted above, possess superhuman strength.

With more than 99% genetic similarity to human beings, chimpanzees do not deserve to be kept in cages or as "pets". Those practices must be outlawed as akin to slavery or unlawful incarceration.

[Marvelmania]

Sad. Chimps can be vicious! They generally go for the face, fingers, toes and testicles if attacking a man. People should know better than to keep a wild animal as a pet.

[Hector]

Speaking from my many years at the zoo...and having chimps at the Oakland Zoo.

Scientists and zoologists have been debating about the "10 times stronger" number for years.

That started a few decades ago.

To correctly measure true comparisons between humans and a chimps' perspective strengths...you need to compare a human and a chimp of the same size and build.

So if you take an average adult male weighing about 140 pounds...and you take an adult male chimp (non-Bonobo) of the same weight, then the most accurate assumption is that the chimps' arms will be about four to five times stronger than the average humans'.

This of course shrinks when you introduce world-class weightlifters.

But then the question would be...what kinda activity? What specific display of strength?

Obviously not in the legs, humans have much stronger legs than chimps...especially power lifters.

Take this former Olympic Russian weightlifter, Leonid Taranenko.

He accomplished the heaviest clean and jerk lift of all times, 586 pounds...



So if you had a chimp with ten times that strength, then it would have been an astonishing 5,860 pounds.

That's basically two cars over your head.

You think a chimp can lift two cars over his head?

Of course not.

But yes, they are stronger than a human...just not ten times stronger.

Besides, the chimps' most deadly attribute is their teeth...then can certainly and literally rip your face off.

[Hector]

Sad. Chimps can be vicious! They generally go for the face, fingers, toes and testicles if attacking a man. People should know better than to keep a wild animal as a pet.

[MysteryWho]

It's sad all the way around.
Leave the chimps in the jungle, people.
Or at the least an ethical zoo.

[Mikey]

Not too long ago I was watching a video (on Discovery or something) about how chimps in the wild gang up on other chimps -- and it's not uncommon for the gang to kill and eat their chimp victims.

They're pretty nasty animals.

[Hector]

Not too long ago I was watching a video (on Discovery or something) about how chimps in the wild gang up on other chimps -- and it's not uncommon for the gang to kill and eat their chimp victims.

They're pretty nasty animals.

They got nothing on humans.

[MysteryWho]

Yeah, I read a story once about a guy who got jumped by some in, I believe, California.
I guess they got loose and it really sounded horrible. Like a horror movie, actually.
They are even known to make weapons and wage war.
In other words, they are almost exactly like us

[jessica]

Speaking from my many years at the zoo...and having chimps at the Oakland Zoo.

Scientists and zoologists have been debating about the "10 times stronger" number for years.

That started a few decades ago.

To correctly measure true comparisons between humans and a chimps' perspective strengths...you need to compare a human and a chimp of the same size and build.

So if you take an average adult male weighing about 140 pounds...and you take an adult male chimp (non-Bonobo) of the same weight, then the most accurate assumption is that the chimps' arms will be about four to five times stronger than the average humans'.

This of course shrinks when you introduce world-class weightlifters.

But then the question would be...what kinda activity? What specific display of strength?

Obviously not in the legs, humans have much stronger legs than chimps...especially power lifters.

Take this former Olympic Russian weightlifter, Leonid Taranenko.

He accomplished the heaviest clean and jerk lift of all times, 586 pounds...

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/4c/Bundesarchiv_Bild_183-1986-0706-018%2C_Leonid_Taranenko.jpg

So if you had a chimp with ten times that strength, then it would have been an astonishing 5,860 pounds.

That's basically two cars over your head.

You think a chimp can lift two cars over his head?

Of course not.

But yes, they are stronger than a human...just not ten times stronger.

Besides, the chimps' most deadly attribute is their teeth...then can certainly and literally rip your face off.

Most of the data on chimp strength is anecdotal and decidedly unscientific. In tests at the Bronx Zoo in 1924, a dynamometer — a scale that measures the mechanical force of a pull on a spring — was erected in the monkey house. A 165-pound male chimpanzee named "Boma" registered a pull of 847 pounds, using only his right hand (although he did have his feet braced against the wall, being somewhat hip, in his simian way, to the principles of leverage). A 165-pound man, by comparison, could manage a one-handed pull of about 210 pounds. Even more frightening, a female chimp, weighing a mere 135 pounds and going by the name of Suzette, checked in with a one-handed pull of 1,260 pounds. In dead lifts, chimps have been known to manage weights of 600 pounds without even breaking into a sweat.