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NCAA satire with a bit of truth

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  • Random Axe
    The Voice of Reason
    • Apr 16, 2008
    • 4518

    NCAA satire with a bit of truth

    LEXINGTON — Kentucky added one of the top-ranked players in the 2016 class today, landing a verbal commitment from 6-foot-9 small forward Mason Roundtree from Chesapeake, Virginia.

    Roundtree made his announcement with his parents beside him and said he settled on Kentucky because he felt John Calipari’s program was the best fit to help him achieve his dream of attending one year of college.

    “No one in my family has ever attended only one year of college,” said Roundtree. “I would be the first.”

    Roundtree’s beaming mother, Claire, confirmed this.

    “I went to four years of college and got my masters,” said Mrs. Roundtree. “My husband went to two years of trade school and Mason’s older sister is a junior at Virginia Tech. But just one year of college? It’s never happened in our family. I’m so proud of my boy.”

    The highly-touted high school junior said he considered other programs, such as Duke, North Carolina and Kansas.

    “There’s too much risk with those programs that the talent around me won’t be good enough to really showcase my abilities for the NBA Draft and I’d be forced to go to college for two years,” he said. “That’s just not something I want to chance.”

    Calipari said he is excited to have Roundtree on the way to Kentucky.

    “I told Mason the same thing I promise all the kids I recruit,” said the coach. “I’ll do everything I can to get you out of here in one year. If you end up going to four years of college, I consider that a complete failure.”
    I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she dumped me before we met.

    If anyone here believes in psychokinesis, please raise my hand.
  • YoungOnce
    Career Member
    • Aug 29, 2007
    • 966

    #2
    I read the satire... Where was the truth part?

    Comment

    • jwyblejr
      galactic yo-yo
      • Apr 6, 2006
      • 11147

      #3
      ^The truth? Some time after being drafted,before the next NBA season starts he'll wind up with some sort of leg injury. I know it's not part of the satire but it seems to happen to quite a few kids coming out of college these days.

      Comment

      • MIB41
        Eloquent Member
        • Sep 25, 2005
        • 15633

        #4
        The truth is there's an unspoken dialogue (in the public) between institutions and many athletes that dictate they're in partnership for only one purpose and that is to increase their revenue stream. I've seen it first hand and it's far from being just a cynical point of view. It's very real. When a college identifies talent, there are no smoke and mirrors. A prominent head coach will make arrangements to show up in your family room and tell you how he can "make it happen." The NCAA and it's supposed policing of sports programs is a complete fraud. They only prosecute when the process gets too sloppy and they are at risk for not doing their jobs. There is positively a farming system between the college and pro institutions that should be obvious to even the most casual of observers. What is scary, is how blatant these institutions are with talking to athletes and their families in such direct fashion. Money is a powerful equalizer.

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