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Never send Grandma to court...

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  • MIB41
    Eloquent Member
    • Sep 25, 2005
    • 15633

    Never send Grandma to court...

    Truly a classic. Read below...

    Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

    In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

    The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
    She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
    youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

    The defense attorney nearly died.

    The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
    'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'


  • toys2cool
    Ultimate Mego Warrior
    • Nov 27, 2006
    • 28605

    #2
    lmao!!
    that was awesome man
    "Time to nut up or shut up" -Tallahassee

    http://ultimatewarriorcollection.webs.com/
    My stuff on facebook Incompatible Browser | Facebook

    Comment

    • HardyGirl
      Mego Museum's Poster Girl
      • Apr 3, 2007
      • 13949

      #3
      Oh man, that's just hysterical!
      "Do you believe, you believe in magic?
      'Cos I believe, I believe that I do,
      Yes, I can see I believe that it's magic
      If your mission is magic your love will shine true."

      Comment

      • Hector
        el Hombre de Acero
        • May 19, 2003
        • 31852

        #4
        sigpic

        Comment

        • SlipperyLilSuckers
          MeGoing
          • May 14, 2003
          • 9031

          #5
          That's hilarious

          Comment

          • Meule
            Verbose Member
            • Nov 14, 2004
            • 28720

            #6
            What a coincidence, my dad emailed me this this morning
            "...The agony of my soul found vent in one loud, long and final scream of despair..." - Edgar Allan Poe

            Comment

            • livnxxxl
              Megoholic RocketScientist
              • Oct 23, 2007
              • 3903

              #7
              Too funny!! Thanks for sharing.
              Enjoy what you like, and let others enjoy what they like. (C) Azrak 2009

              Too much space. Need more toys!



              Check out the ever growing Mego like sized vehicles data base.

              Comment

              • Bo8a_Fett
                Pat Troughton in disguise
                • Nov 21, 2007
                • 3738

                #8
                ENGLISH AND DAMN PROUD OF IT British by birth....English by the grace of God. Yes Jamie...it is big isn't it....

                Comment

                • EmergencyIan
                  Museum Paramedic
                  • Aug 31, 2005
                  • 5470

                  #9
                  Thanks for the laugh. That was too great!!!

                  - Ian
                  Rampart, this is Squad 51. How do you read?

                  Comment

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