Real life superpowers. Anybody else have one?

[LonnieFisher]

I guess I found my superpower. Anti-Wolverine healing factor! Not quite as pathetic as Mister Glass, but still pretty lame. My leg has been broken for over fourteen months.
Anybody else have a superpower? Something cool maybe?

[Rallygirl]

I have the uncanny and amazingly useless ability to wake up fifteen minutes before the alarm goes off EVERY SINGLE morning.

[Brown Bear]

I took after my Mom for having the amazing ability to ALWAYS sneeze twice. I don't think I have ever sneezed one time without a second sneeze right after.

[jwyblejr]

I have the ability to either bore or annoy people.

[wayne foundation 07]

I have the ability to either bore or annoy people.

I am both bored and annoyed with you

[LonnieFisher]

I have the uncanny and amazingly useless ability to wake up fifteen minutes before the alarm goes off EVERY SINGLE morning.

Precognition? Awesome!

[LonnieFisher]

I took after my Mom for having the amazing ability to ALWAYS sneeze twice. I don't think I have ever sneezed one time without a second sneeze right after.

You need to learn to harness the power. The first sneeze is a buildup so the second can be super extra strong and blow brick walls down or start hurricanes! Killer for a villains power.

[LonnieFisher]

I have the ability to either bore or annoy people.

Another great villain power! Bore people into a coma or annoy them to the point of insanity.

[LonnieFisher]

I am both bored and annoyed with you

The power of sarcasm! It almost gives you the powers of a human spider.

[nazgul]

I have the uncanny ability to miss amazing Mego Buy it Now deals on Ebay by mere seconds......

[Rallygirl]

I have the uncanny and amazingly useless ability to wake up fifteen minutes before the alarm goes off EVERY SINGLE morning.

Precognition? Awesome!

Now if it only applied to something useful like winning lottery numbers, or race horses,...sigh.

[Mikey]

I can chug a fifth of vodka --no BS

[Random Axe]

I've often thought of this as a mutant ability or superpower. I can say anything to anyone no matter how ridiculous, corny, disgusting or offensive with a complete straight face. We're talking deadpan, serious as a heart attack face and tone. I can also whip up some serious bs on the spot and make it sound convincing as well. Here's an example:

My wife was in the car with me and we were on a highway going through a large construction zone with the orange barrells as far as you can see. After a few miles it cleared and then picked up again, this time with the orange and white barrel-height cones. She asked me what the difference was and I told her that there's a button on the top of the cones that make them expand to barrels depending on what kind of construction zone they are in. To this day she still believes this.

[4NDR01D]

I attract pug hair. I've yet to decide whether to use this power for good or evil.

[jwyblejr]

I've often thought of this as a mutant ability or superpower. I can say anything to anyone no matter how ridiculous, corny, disgusting or offensive with a complete straight face. We're talking deadpan, serious as a heart attack face and tone. I can also whip up some serious bs on the spot and make it sound convincing as well. Here's an example:

My wife was in the car with me and we were on a highway going through a large construction zone with the orange barrells as far as you can see. After a few miles it cleared and then picked up again, this time with the orange and white barrel-height cones. She asked me what the difference was and I told her that there's a button on the top of the cones that make them expand to barrels depending on what kind of construction zone they are in. To this day she still believes this.

Sounds like my grandmother's one brother. I always said I would never play poker against the man.