Let's try these for a few months to see if ticket sales increase
Buffalo – You think our climate is cold? Look at our Super Bowl record.
Cleveland – Just good enough to avoid a great draft pick
Seahawks – Sorry about the last decade
Saints – Give us our coach back and we’ll give you these beads
Ravens – Could be worse, could still be in Cleveland
Raiders – Our fans are more intimidating than our team
Patriots – We’re good, but with one GIANT problem
Panthers – If cats were beaten any more PETA would step in
San Fran – We’ve turned a corner, let’s see if we can stay straight
Packers – Rodgers has more time in the pocket than a high school condom
Lions – We’re back! That’s right we made bail.
Jets – Dare Tebow to beat you with his arm? He’s a virgin, his arm is STRONG.
Jaguars – We have more blackouts than Gary Busey
Giants – Second best Manning arm, best Manning neck
Falcons – Like adult movies, great receivers no protection
Cowboys – The one star isn’t just an emblem, it’s our rating
Colts – Our QB stayed in college longer than all of the Raiders combined
Chargers – Like a vegan muffin, great ingredients but we still suck
Cardinals – Our defense is more porous than our border
Buccaneers – We host Super Bowls, not play in them.
Bengals – More ankle monitors than playoff wins
Buffalo – You think our climate is cold? Look at our Super Bowl record.
Cleveland – Just good enough to avoid a great draft pick
Seahawks – Sorry about the last decade
Saints – Give us our coach back and we’ll give you these beads
Ravens – Could be worse, could still be in Cleveland
Raiders – Our fans are more intimidating than our team
Patriots – We’re good, but with one GIANT problem
Panthers – If cats were beaten any more PETA would step in
San Fran – We’ve turned a corner, let’s see if we can stay straight
Packers – Rodgers has more time in the pocket than a high school condom
Lions – We’re back! That’s right we made bail.
Jets – Dare Tebow to beat you with his arm? He’s a virgin, his arm is STRONG.
Jaguars – We have more blackouts than Gary Busey
Giants – Second best Manning arm, best Manning neck
Falcons – Like adult movies, great receivers no protection
Cowboys – The one star isn’t just an emblem, it’s our rating
Colts – Our QB stayed in college longer than all of the Raiders combined
Chargers – Like a vegan muffin, great ingredients but we still suck
Cardinals – Our defense is more porous than our border
Buccaneers – We host Super Bowls, not play in them.
Bengals – More ankle monitors than playoff wins
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