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Stephen King's "The Stand directed by...

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  • kept back
    Persistent Member
    • Aug 2, 2002
    • 1203

    Stephen King's "The Stand directed by...

    http://screenrant.com/the-stand-step...-sandy-147642/

    Ben Affleck? He actually seems to be better at directing than acting, so this may be an OK move on WB's part. My concern is the source material. I know a lot of people pick The Stand as their favorite King book, but I got pretty bored with it. I thought it was a really interesting idea that feels like it wonders at the midway point and then rushes to it's conclusion.

    The only way I was able to finish it was to turn it into the ultimate dick and fart joke extravaganza;

    Kevin Smith's The Stand

    BOULDER
    Stu Redman - Matt Damon(Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl)

    Frances Goldsmith - Liv Tyler(Jersey Girl)

    Harold Lauder - Trevor Fehrman(Clerks II)

    Glen Bateman - George Carlin(Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl)

    Susan Stern - Jennifer Schwalbach-Smith(Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl, Clerks II, Zack and Miri)
    (Mick Garris cast his wife as Susan in the mini series, so why not)

    Dayna Jurgens - Ali Larter(Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)

    Larry Underwood - Ben Affleck(Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl, Clerks II)
    (tell me audiences wouldn't stand and cheer seeing Affleck blow up at the end. Plus, he was the bomb in Phantoms.)

    Nadine Cross - Linda Fiorentino(Dogma)
    (I'm pretty sure Smith thought this chick was the Devil personified)

    Lucy Swan - Joey Lauren Adams(Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)

    Judge Farris - Stan Lee(Mallrats)
    (We need a cool old man that knows everything, and that is Stan Lee to a T. Just ask him.)

    Nick Andros - Kevin Smith
    (silent through the whole thing only to speak sage advice at the end)

    Tom Cullen - Ethan Suplee(Mallrats,Chasing Amy,Dogma, Clerks II)
    (In Suplee's dumb guy voice "M-O-O-N. That Spells Tom Cullen.")

    Ralph Brentner - Stephen Root(Jersey Girl)

    Mother Abigail - Chris Rock(Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)-
    (say it in Rock's voice "I'm 106 years old, and I still makes my own bread")

    VEGAS
    Randall Flagg - Jason Lee(Mallrats, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl, Clerks II)
    ("You look hungry, Loyd. Care for a chocolate covered pretzel?")

    Lloyd Henreid - Scott Mosier(Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Clerks II)
    ("Mr. Flagg has come down with a sudden case of diphtheria")

    Trash Can - Jason Mewes(All of 'em. It's Jay for f***'s sake)
    ("MY LIFE FOR YOU NAGANOOCH!")

    Julie Lawry - Eliza Dushku(Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)
    (Quick! Who said this line, Sissy or Julie Lawry? "Stealing, boning, blowing sh*t up, and now you're like this little priss with a conscience. It's really a f******drag.")

    Whitney Horgan - Michael Rooker(Mallrats)

    Jenny Engstrom - Shannon Elizabeth(Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)
    (honestly this is mostly in hopes of seeing her on a stripper pole or making out with Ali Larter)

    Barry Dorgan - Mike Starr(Jersey Girl)

    The Rat Man - Dwight Ewell(Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back)
    ************************************************** ***************

    There it is. Smith's greatest masterpiece all laid out for him. Now let's hear some more (realistic) casting ideas. Whadda ya got. folks?
    Last edited by kept back; Mar 16, '12, 1:13 PM.
    Of all the souls I have encountered his was the most...human.
  • garagesale
    Dept. of Mego Studies
    • Aug 8, 2006
    • 1142

    #2
    As a fan of both The Stand and Kevin Smith's work, I have to say that this is right on target! Smith should consider doing it for his next project!

    This kind of mash-up stuff reminds me of the Pulp Fiction done Shakespeare-style that's really hot right now in LA.

    JamesD

    http://www.libarts.uco.edu/english/adjunct/dolph/

    THANKS!

    Comment

    • kept back
      Persistent Member
      • Aug 2, 2002
      • 1203

      #3
      I figure the military crew that lets the virus escape will be made up of Walt Flanagan, Bryan Johnson, Brian O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson, Guinevere Turner...all the usual Kevin Smith players. Gotta make sure everybody gets in there at some point.
      Of all the souls I have encountered his was the most...human.

      Comment

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