Dark Shadows

[MIB41]

Don't let some of these glowing reviews mislead those of you who anticipate a gothic thriller, this is not a serious gothic film at all. It is a cross between Death Becomes Her & Beetlejuice. It is NOTHING at all like Sleepy Hollow. Barnabas is the butt of at least 20 more bad jokes, and behaves the buffoon in about 10 more situations which are not represented in any of the trailers.

I can appreciate a different point of view, but please don't advertise that people with a different perspective than yours are out to "MISLEAD" this forum simply because it didn't meet with your lofty expectations. Thanks!

[Dark Shadow]

I give the film about a 5 outta 10. Buffoonabas may be a more appropriate name for this vampire than Barnabas. Johnny Depp is Captain Jack Sparrow performing as Barnabas Collins. Sadly, Cap'n Jack loses himself in this character only sporadically. I'd say, conservatively, that the humorous aspects of this film are more along the lines of about 35-45%.

Angelique is nothing more than a single dimensional cartoon of a witch. Her motive is over simplified and her actions are absurdly wreckless. Roger & Dr. Hoffman are nothing more than toss-away characters, and it seems obvious to me this is due to the fact that the powers that be had no clue what to do with them. Carolyn's portrayal is fresh & enjoyable, yet sadly jumps the shark just before the finale. David & Victoria are made over fairly well in this version and I very much enjoyed their characterizations. Elizabeth is truly the most favorable of the bunch...IMO. I also enjoyed the inclusion of David's mother, Laura, but was confused as to what she's actually supposed to be in this version. She's described as cyclical, but appears as an apparition/banshee.

Loved the visuals...the sets & wardrobe were perfect. The score was awesome, original & fresh with a few seasonal tidbits from Robert Cobert's cues scattered here & there. The prologue had much potential, but was rushed along far too quickly in order for us to promptly arrive at, and immerse ourselves in, all of the wonderful 1972 references. (Just in case we're too thick to grasp that this movie is supposed to be set in 1972, there are 100's of references to constantly remind us). The intro of Victoria to the family was done very well, as was the return of Barnabas Collins. Jossette's ghost is awesome. From the point "Angie" & Buffoonabas reacquaint onward...the movie fades in & out of cohesion and back & forth between comedy & semi-seriousness.

The best part of Alice's performance is when Carolyn provides the opening plea in the The Ballad Of Dwight Frye. Liz's reaction is classic Liz. Not so sure that many will grasp the meaning behind it, I think it's designed to be a clever covert nod to the original series...because nothing is mentioned in this version that would substantiate that particular reference. If the masses were intended to understand it, then something important must have ended up on the cutting room floor. Otherwise...this is clearly an alert & coherent modern day Alice, nothing at all like the alcohol induced deranged performances he delivered back in 1972. (Also would like to point out that it looks like the poster Carolyn has in her room of a skeletal Alice dressed in leather is from his 1978/79 From The Inside Tour...oops!)

Hated the monster soup mess that's created at the end. How many supernaturals are enough for one film? One? Two? Three? Four? Five? Six? It reminds me of the super hero films that feel the need to toss in multiple villains...it becomes nothing more than a convoluted mess.

Also, who is this current family descended from? Naomi & Joshua travelled to America alone and had only one child in this version...Barnabas. (I know, not supposed to question, just blindly follow along.)

What's the point of calling a film Dark Shadows...if nothing actually resides in the shadows? Yep...the monsters in the new DS are "Out" & "Proud", much less 1972 than 2012.

Regarding the previously claimed unapologetic nature of this vampire: he literally apologizes...prior to at least two, perhaps as many as three, of his slaughters. I also disagree that the trailers are "way" off...the first trailer is a dead on representation of this film...IMO.

Don't let some of these glowing reviews mislead those of you who anticipate a gothic thriller, this is not a serious gothic film at all. It is a cross between Death Becomes Her & Beetlejuice. It is NOTHING at all like Sleepy Hollow. Barnabas is the butt of at least 20 more bad jokes, and behaves the buffoon in about 10 more situations which are not represented in any of the trailers.

Honest to God...Angelique projectile vomits roach infested green slime all over Barnabas, after which Mrs. Johnson attempts to wipe his face clean with a household spray cleanser. Which leads to another problem I have with over abundance of 1972 pop culture references...they travel beyond 1972 with references to such things as AC/DC's Big Balls & the Exorcist.

It saddens me to admit that Snow White & The Huntsman appears to be more of a serious dark thriller than Dark Shadows turned out to be. As a matter of fact, Dark Shadows is like expecting SW&TH and getting Mirror Mirror instead. What I thought to be a perfect match, DS & Burton, ended up to be a great disappointment. I do not look forward to any future Depp/Burton collaborations, I think they have become too permissive with each other's whims.

If you're a DS fan and you're on the fence, I'd say go and get it out of your system...just go with lowered expectations. There are glimmers of the great film this could have been, traces of the original story by August, I think, prior to Grahame's comedic tweaks. Those glimmers are well worth seeing...just don't expect a great film, by any stretch.

Also, due to sexual innoendo & overt (although clothed) foreplay, I do not believe this movie is suitable for young children.

[MIB41]

I still have no interest, the humor/bad jokes (from the trailers) killed any interest I had in it.
Dana

The humor in the ads covers about 5 percent of the film. The trailers are just way off. The real story covers a 200 year conflict between Barnabus and a witch. It's quite good and the effects are a nice surprise. And Barnabus is no light weight either. When he kills, he means to and without apology. Sometimes he lures innocent people in with his "humor". It's a far more wicked tale than what is advertised. It should have been advertised more like Sleepy Hallow.

[danadoll]

I still have no interest, the humor/bad jokes (from the trailers) killed any interest I had in it.

Dana

[Hector]

I will definitely go see Dark Shadows.

[palitoy]

I was too damned tired to go see it this weekend but now more than ever, I'm gonna try and book a sitter.

[Goblin19]

Toyroom nailed it pretty well. I expected more of a straight up comedy, but was pleasantly surprised by the actual story. It does go off the rails a bit too much at the emd, though.

[emeraldknight47]

MIB41 and I will likely be seeing DS some evening this week, so I'm looking forward to it!

[Figuremod73]

The way it was marketed had made me decide not to see it. I'll probably give a chance based on your critiques.

[BlackKnight]

They Put this Movie in The Kiddie Theater out here ....
I guess the Previews shoulda suggested B.J.'s and Rageful Sex Scenes then.

[MIB41]

^^^ YES! Alice Cooper was awesome in this movie. And it played so well to the overall story. Dark Shadows just nails all the right tones and images of that era. Need I add the actor who played Rorschach in the Watchmen is the butler here? Very unique in every way. I don't know how you can be a fan of this genre and not like this movie. It's that good. I don't see many films multiple times in the theater. Typical they don't impress me enough to spend the money more than once. This I will see several times.

[The Toyroom]

I need to add some Alice Cooper to my iPod today

[MIB41]

10 might be a little young for this Chris. The film is pretty intense in places and is actually pretty bloody as well. Plus it has a few provocative scenes that would probably not be appropriate for children. No nudity, but heavy on the innuendo. It's an amazing film though. I guarantee you 30 minutes in, you'll be saying, "Wow. How did marketing miss this?" It's an engaging story.

[The Toyroom]

The bj scene is "suggested"...Dr Hoffman drops down to her knees, cut to Barnabas' surprised face and then cut to next scene.

The wild romp between Barnabas and Angelique in her office will be much harder to gloss over...

[Earth 2 Chris]

You guys are actually making me want to see this, and I'd pretty much decided against it in theaters.

I'm guessing not appropriate for a 10-year old though? A BJ scne?!?

Chris