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My story is similar to antiquetiger's. I was working at McDonald's back in the late 80's and one day I go in and there's this attractive new girl. Our maintenance man Mike walks up and I ask him if he's seen the new girl. He says yes. I tell him, "She's hot. I might have to ask her out." Mike said, "She's my wife."
I would take that as a compliment. I dissed this guy's wife to the lowest level.
My story is similar to antiquetiger's. I was working at McDonald's back in the late 80's and one day I go in and there's this attractive new girl. Our maintenance man Mike walks up and I ask him if he's seen the new girl. He says yes. I tell him, "She's hot. I might have to ask her out." Mike said, "She's my wife."
ok here's one me and bro said we would never repeat. My wife forced us to go to the New kids on the Block concert. While we were there with about 40,000 screaming chicks, we go to get something to eat and drink(My wife stayed in the seats)...we see some hot chicks looking at us in the line,so my brother says something and they start to laugh and whisper, while they were leaving they say"Uhh you guys look so cute together,and in a NKOTB concert,how sweet is that?" we look at each other and say W*T*F?? NO!! we're not Gay!! we're brothers!! and everyone around us was like yeah sure all these hot chicks laughing
I passed out at the university library because I was freaked out about not having done my semester's daily diary of the weather. It was due in a few days, and I had done NOTHING all semester, so I had to look through 3 or 4 months of weather. I woke up on the floor and everyone was looking down at me...just like what you see in the movies. They made me take a blood test because they thought I was preggers.
One time, I was making out with hot chick on stage in front of 40000 people, and my tummy began to quiver, and I had diarea in my white pants, and it went all over, and everybody started to laugh, and the girl was really grossed out and barfed on me, and then I fainted and landed face first in the barf and poo.
My first attempt at water skiing. If ever there should have been a video camera...THIS IS IT. Now let's get my frame pegged correctly here - I'm 6'4, probably 215 in those days (this happened about 20 years ago). My best friend instructs me to sit down into the water with my skis out in front of me. He tells me not to try and pull against the rope which I instinctively want to do. He says, "Tom, just hold on, but don't pull. Let the boat do it for you." After a few false starts, I'm ticked off because I want to pull on the rope. Finally I relax my arms and I tell myself "I'm going to do this." The boat starts going and the boat starts pulling me...problem...my legs are not use to this action and I'm trying to keep them together as I'm going up. Suddenly they go east and west and I go down on my rear BUT... for reasons I can't justify to this day... I don't let go of the line. So my legs and skiis go up in the air, IN FRONT OF ME, and I am literally skiing on my rear as water pounds me unmercifully in the face. Their screaming something at me but due to my self-imposed death grip on the line and the wonderful water ride on my face I can't hear them. The boat comes to a stop and I look up and don't see anyone on board. Both my friends are on the deck of the boat on their backs crying their laughing so hard. It get's better... I STILL haven't let go of the line. My buddy Mike inbetween gasping for air says, "Will you let go of the line please?!" Let me tell you something. When I let go of that line, it had so much recoil, it literally snapped back through the air and OVER THE BOAT that was some 15 to 20 yards in front of me. It was probably the funniest d*mn thing I have ever done and my buddy can't even talk about it now without laughing hysterically. He says it will probably be the last thing he thinks about when he's dying. I retired from water skiing and went on to snow skiing instead... I haven't killed anyone yet.
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