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The thing that always bugged me about the Planet of the Apes movies.

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  • Werewolf
    Inhuman
    • Jul 14, 2003
    • 14615

    The thing that always bugged me about the Planet of the Apes movies.

    Okay, the whole thing started because cats and dogs all died from a virus so people took in Chimpanzees, Gorillas and Orangutans as pets.

    So, people took in animals that can weigh up to 450 pounds, 5 and a half feet tall, violent and strong enough to rip their heads off as a replacement for house cats and poodles. Instead of say like rabbits, hedgehogs, squirrels, foxes, skunks, ferrets, parrots, canaries, chinchillas, mice, hamsters, raccoons etc. You know domestic Skunks actually make pretty good pets. They are sweet and can be trained to use litter boxes. But they were like to hell with those cute small animals I want a huge damn super strong mountain gorilla in my house.
    You are a bold and courageous person, afraid of nothing. High on a hill top near your home, there stands a dilapidated old mansion. Some say the place is haunted, but you don't believe in such myths. One dark and stormy night, a light appears in the topmost window in the tower of the old house. You decide to investigate... and you never return...
  • PNGwynne
    Master of Fowl Play
    • Jun 5, 2008
    • 19444

    #2
    Somehow I don't think the social commentary would have been as trenchant with skunks, racoons, and rodents.
    WANTED: Dick Grayson SI trousers; gray AJ Mustang horse; vintage RC Batman (Bruce Wayne) head; minty Wolfman tights; mint Black Knight sword; minty Launcelot boots; Lion Rock (pale) Dracula & Mummy heads; Lion Rock Franky squared boots; Wayne Foundation blue furniture; Flash Gordon/Ming (10") unbroken holsters; CHiPs gloved arms; POTA T2 tan body; CTVT/vintage Friar Tuck robes, BBP TZ Burgess Meredith glasses.

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    • Werewolf
      Inhuman
      • Jul 14, 2003
      • 14615

      #3
      Originally posted by PNGwynne
      Somehow I don't think the social commentary would have been as trenchant with skunks, racoons, and rodents.
      I get I'm over thinking this but seriously people would not take apes as pets. They are HUGE and super dangerous. It absolutely makes no sense. Planet of the Apes dystopian future would never happen because people would just domesticate other small cute animals like foxes. Fennec fox 3.5 pounds and cute as heck or 130 pound chimpanzee that will rip your face and hands off. I know what I'd choose.

      Again I know I am over thinking it. It's just how my mind works.

      I'm not insulting the movies. They are good movies. They're classics. Great acting and make up. It's just something that has always kinda bugged me.
      You are a bold and courageous person, afraid of nothing. High on a hill top near your home, there stands a dilapidated old mansion. Some say the place is haunted, but you don't believe in such myths. One dark and stormy night, a light appears in the topmost window in the tower of the old house. You decide to investigate... and you never return...

      Comment

      • Hector
        el Hombre de Acero
        • May 19, 2003
        • 31852

        #4
        Gorillas and orangutans are okay and mostly benevolent towards humans (wild Silverbacks mostly mock charges you)...chimpanzees on the other hand though...
        sigpic

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        • PNGwynne
          Master of Fowl Play
          • Jun 5, 2008
          • 19444

          #5
          Chimps are scary as hell.
          WANTED: Dick Grayson SI trousers; gray AJ Mustang horse; vintage RC Batman (Bruce Wayne) head; minty Wolfman tights; mint Black Knight sword; minty Launcelot boots; Lion Rock (pale) Dracula & Mummy heads; Lion Rock Franky squared boots; Wayne Foundation blue furniture; Flash Gordon/Ming (10") unbroken holsters; CHiPs gloved arms; POTA T2 tan body; CTVT/vintage Friar Tuck robes, BBP TZ Burgess Meredith glasses.

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          • enyawd72
            Maker of Monsters!
            • Oct 1, 2009
            • 7904

            #6
            Originally posted by Werewolf
            Okay, the whole thing started because cats and dogs all died from a virus so people took in Chimpanzees, Gorillas and Orangutans as pets.

            So, people took in animals that can weigh up to 450 pounds, 5 and a half feet tall, violent and strong enough to rip their heads off as a replacement for house cats and poodles. Instead of say like rabbits, hedgehogs, squirrels, foxes, skunks, ferrets, parrots, canaries, chinchillas, mice, hamsters, raccoons etc. You know domestic Skunks actually make pretty good pets. They are sweet and can be trained to use litter boxes. But they were like to hell with those cute small animals I want a huge damn super strong mountain gorilla in my house.
            EXACTLY. THIS is why I've ALWAYS said Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes has a better story. I don't care what anyone else thinks...it's my favorite Apes film. It took the themes of the original and expanded on them, and created some fantastic original characters in Thade, Attar and Limbo.

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            • Werewolf
              Inhuman
              • Jul 14, 2003
              • 14615

              #7
              Even ignoring the danger of them you aren't going to be sitting on the couch watching TV gently petting an adult silverback in your lap. And where is it going to go potty? Because it sure as hell ain't using wee wee pads. Putting diapers on a 450 pound adult silver back isn't gonna be easy.
              You are a bold and courageous person, afraid of nothing. High on a hill top near your home, there stands a dilapidated old mansion. Some say the place is haunted, but you don't believe in such myths. One dark and stormy night, a light appears in the topmost window in the tower of the old house. You decide to investigate... and you never return...

              Comment

              • TrekStar
                Trek or Treat
                • Jan 20, 2011
                • 8354

                #8
                Oh now come on, who wouldn’t want a nice warm cuddly Orangutan to play with and tickle? of course if you wanted Tangs-Chimps and Gorillas, I would get a female, because when it comes that time for males, you all better run for cover.

                Comment

                • Werewolf
                  Inhuman
                  • Jul 14, 2003
                  • 14615

                  #9
                  To be clear, I'm not trying to mock the movies. The first movie in the series was groundbreaking and I think the TV series was a lot of fun. I think it all just worked better without knowing what caused it. Because the explanation they came up with didn't really work and kind of ruined the mystery of it. I don't know. I'm just weird.
                  Last edited by Werewolf; Mar 9, '20, 9:42 PM.
                  You are a bold and courageous person, afraid of nothing. High on a hill top near your home, there stands a dilapidated old mansion. Some say the place is haunted, but you don't believe in such myths. One dark and stormy night, a light appears in the topmost window in the tower of the old house. You decide to investigate... and you never return...

                  Comment

                  • Hector
                    el Hombre de Acero
                    • May 19, 2003
                    • 31852

                    #10
                    A gorilla is gonna poo in your backyard, just like Fido...
                    sigpic

                    Comment

                    • Hector
                      el Hombre de Acero
                      • May 19, 2003
                      • 31852

                      #11
                      And I’m sorry...nothing more terrifying than humans...they make chimps look like angels.

                      A chimp will rip your face off and go after your genitalia. But humans will also do that plus rob, con, rape, poison, torture, kill your entire family, steal your identity, decapitate, shoot, pollute, deceive, drive you insane, plan further evil things...and...well...you just can’t compare a chimp to the worlds most dangerous animal...homo sapiens...

                      I’m glad the Apes won...

                      sigpic

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                      • Nostalgiabuff
                        Muddling through
                        • Oct 4, 2008
                        • 11290

                        #12
                        they really weren't pets though, they were trained as servants and were treated as slaves

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                        • Hedji
                          Citizen of Gotham
                          • Nov 17, 2012
                          • 7246

                          #13
                          The part I had to force myself to accept was that wild apes evolved into the more human hybrid Roddy McDowall in a matter of decades. You can train apes, sure... but they end up more like Eastwood's Clyde and less like McDowall's Caesar.

                          The virus story also conflicted with the original concept that the Apes were a nuclear war mutation. Yet, both storylines led to exactly the same outcome.

                          But hey, science fiction.

                          Fun Fact: Did you know that Apes sequel writer Paul Dehn was the life partner of Legendary Hammer Film Composer James Bernard?

                          Comment

                          • Werewolf
                            Inhuman
                            • Jul 14, 2003
                            • 14615

                            #14
                            Originally posted by Hedji

                            But hey, science fiction.
                            That's really the best explanation.

                            I really do enjoy the movies and sometimes I know I just over think stuff. Like I also think that there still would have been apes world wide that would have been kept as pets and treated like surrogate children and family members instead of servants. What happens to them and their families? Ugh, again I'm over thinking it.
                            You are a bold and courageous person, afraid of nothing. High on a hill top near your home, there stands a dilapidated old mansion. Some say the place is haunted, but you don't believe in such myths. One dark and stormy night, a light appears in the topmost window in the tower of the old house. You decide to investigate... and you never return...

                            Comment

                            • Mikey
                              Verbose Member
                              • Aug 9, 2001
                              • 47242

                              #15
                              I've always wondered about the Statue of Liberty

                              As a kid I used to think "you blew it up" referred to the statue and we were only looking at the top half of it.

                              But then on the other hand, no way after only a few thousand years could the land rise around the statue that much and burry its bottom half

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