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My father passed away last night

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  • Megolike
    New Member
    • May 29, 2019
    • 14

    #31
    sorry for your loss

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    • kresge1
      Museum_Bozo
      • Jun 20, 2001
      • 5134

      #32
      So sorry for your loss
      Looking for Remco Phantom. Mego mailer boxed figures

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      • Liu Bei
        Banned
        • Mar 31, 2018
        • 755

        #33
        Originally posted by VintageMike
        If you're not on facebook (I know a few people here aren't) I announced my father passed away overnight after a years-long battle with Alzheimer's/Dementia. Every time he had a slide it would be bad. From researching it looked like he had entered the next to last stage this year. Things escalated and last month we got in a live-in aide. He was in good spirits and it took a lot of the burden off my Mom. Unfortunately, he was getting physically very weak. I came home last night after an extended day at work to find out he had a been coughing up/nauseous all day. I and the aid propped him up in the chair but he was noticeably not talking only making noises. He was also shaking. To me, it looked very much like he was dying, but my Mom thought he would recover. I also reasoned, as to not upset my mother since he had a rough day and that he had been given medication it may be why he was that condition. Unfortunately, I was right as he finally fell asleep and never woke up. I found out when I got up for work (I get up very early) and my mother came down and informed me he was gone. Considering what the next stage would be, it was probably for the best as he no longer has to suffer. He still knew who my Mom and I were, still watched movies and still enjoyed music. I spent time with him Monday and he still talking and tapping his feet to music I put on for him. But he had started losing interest in food over the weekend. The last time the aide and I took him to his chair he had to be carried, he couldn't walk even with both of us assisting. But given the fact he wasn't completely gone mentally, I think his body just gave out before his mind. I am again glad his suffering is over and without knowing it's pretty fair to say we worked hard to give him a quality of life when other families would have understandably given up.
        Sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family. He departed peacefully and in the presence of a family who loved him, that at least may be of some small comfort. God bless you and yours.

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        • TrekStar
          Trek or Treat
          • Jan 20, 2011
          • 8354

          #34
          My deepest condolences, it's tough thing to have to go thru.

          Comment

          • Confessional
            Maker & Whatnot
            • Aug 8, 2012
            • 3410

            #35
            Sorry for your loss Mike.

            Comment

            • VintageMike
              Permanent Member
              • Dec 16, 2004
              • 3376

              #36
              This was actually something I was struggling with. A lot of things I get through or do because I know that's what my dad would have wanted. However, this was tough. He would want me to go and have fun but he would also want me to be there for my Mom. Unable to decide I asked my Mom yesterday and said whatever she wanted to me to do I would do. She said to go and it would be good to be around friends. Even though I already knew, I've seen the support she has from her friends, and when I finally went for lunch today she had friends over who just left as I came home. We've planned to do things together in my father's honor (like go out for father's day), so we are getting there. My hope is a few days back at work, good or bad will get me back into some sense of normalcy and this trip will a major jolt to back into happiness as much as that is possible at this stage.

              Originally posted by Random Axe
              Mike, I'm sorry to read this but I'm not surprised by the decline. I know you'd reached out to us recently on his condition, and I know from firsthand experience dementia often works rapidly. My father died from Alzheimers/dementia in 2015 as was the last remaining sibling of 11 children. All of them died from that disease. It's a cruel, horrible and unfair disease to deal with as a family caregiver. You've faced this down the best you could and stayed true to the mission. That's truly all any of us can do.

              The next few days are going to be a roller coaster emotionally. I hope to be able to see your spirits lifted a little bit in Columbus in two weeks.

              Thanks everyone for the support, it means a lot.

              Comment

              • Hector
                el Hombre de Acero
                • May 19, 2003
                • 31852

                #37
                I’m so sorry for your loss. My mom has been stricken with dementia for almost 7 years now (my sister and I take care of her as well as a part time caregiver). This has been tougher than when dad had terminal cancer. At least he got to travel and enjoy himself by being lucid. Mom doesn’t have that luxury. Alzheimer’s/Dementia sucks, it really, really sucks.

                But I know even by your heavy loss...there’s relief as well for all those involved.

                My deepest heartfelt condolences...may your father rest in peace.
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